Often when I speak to a client a common concern is anxiety or depression. Sometimes the client will not be able to identify the reason for the anxiety or depression, it is just a sense of not feeling right, a foreboding feeling that hangs like an ominous cloud over them.
When we discuss these feelings, I explain the concept of Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), how the thoughts we have, influence how we feel, which can then alter our behaviour.
I ask the client what they are thinking, what thoughts are going through their heads, essentially what are they telling themselves?
What we identify is that these are not always intentional thoughts, but unconscious things we tell ourselves, without even realising we are doing it.
In almost all cases, the ‘automatic thoughts’ are negative. In CBT these thoughts are called Negative Automatic
Thoughts (NAT's). They may not always be directly about themselves, it may be about others, it may also be about the world around them. But the thoughts are creating a sense of dread, sadness, or apathy.
The result of these feelings often leads to the withdrawal from daily life, reducing their interaction with family and friends. However, there is no evidence that this helps improve the feelings, quite the opposite, the thoughts and feelings become worse.
Of all the conversations we have daily, the longest and most influential we have is with ourselves!
Therefore, when we talk negatively to ourselves, for example ‘I can’t do that’, ‘there’s no point, it won’t work’, ‘they don’t like me’, ‘I don’t have any real friends’, STOP!
Imagine yourself having the same conversation with a loved one. Would you be feeding them with these negative comments? Then why do you do it to yourself?
In a future blog I will address ways to recognise and address negative thoughts, turning negative (maladaptive) thoughts into positive (adaptive) thoughts.
Comments